4 Female Characters I Relate to the Most (And My Spirit Animal) - Phoebe Buffay (Friends)

Phoebe: Listen to this! My reading was wrong, I’m not going to die!
Rachel: Really?! How do you know?
Phoebe: Because my psychic is dead! She must’ve read the cards wrong!
Rachel: Oh, I’m sorry.
Phoebe: Eh, better her than me! Hey, let’s bake cookies!

Top 5 Favorite Screencaps, Friends, 10x16 TOW Rachel’s Going Away Party (requested by sheburnsaway)

Top 5 Favorite Screencaps, Friends, 6x17, TOW Unagi (requested by rachelrusa)

Mike: Hey!
Phoebe: Hey! Welcome back!
Mike: Oh, I missed you!
Phoebe: Oh, me too!
Mike: So what’s new?
Phoebe: Well, I’m no longer Phoebe Buffay.
Mike: That’s great! You changed your name?
Phoebe: Yes, I did! Meet… Princess Consuela Bananahammock.
Mike: You’re kidding, right?
Phoebe: Nope!
Mike: You really did that?
Phoebe: Yep!
Mike: But, you-you can’t do that.
Phoebe: Why? Why? It’s fun, it’s different. No one else has a name like it.
Mike: Alright, then I’m gonna change my name.
Phoebe: Great! Okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Mike: Crap Bag.
Phoebe: Mike Crap Bag?
Mike: No. Not Mike, just Crap Bag. First name Crap, last name Bag.
Phoebe: You’re not serious, right?
Mike: Yes, I’m serious. It’s fun, it’s different. No one else has a name like that!
Phoebe: Mhmm. Well, then, great! If you love it, I love it.
Mike: I do love it. And I love your name. I love Princess Consuela.
Phoebe: And I love Crap.

Friends 10x14, The One With Princess Consuela

Monica: Chandler…in all my life… I never thought I would be so lucky as to fall in love with my best [sobs], my best… There’s a reason why girls don’t do this!
Chandler: Okay, okay! I’ll do it. I thought… [sobs] Wait, I can do this. I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you…you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. And if you let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. Monica… will you marry me?
Monica: Yes.

Friends 6x24, TOW The Proposal Pt. 2

Joey: I can’t believe Ross is going out with Rachel’s sister. When Chandler made out with my sister, I was mad at him for ten years!
Chandler: That was, like, five years ago.
Joey: Yeah, you got five years left!
Chandler: Joey —
Joey: You wanna make it six?

Friends 6x14, TOW Chandler Can’t Cry

Joey: So, Ross and Rachel got married, Monica and Chandler almost got married…do you think you and I should hook up?
Phoebe: Oh we do, but not just yet.
Joey: Really?! Well, when?
Phoebe: Okay umm, well, first Chandler and Monica will get married and be filthy rich by the way. Yeah. But it won’t work out.
Joey: Wow.
Phoebe: I know. Then, I’m gonna marry Chandler - for the money - and you’ll marry Rachel and have the beautiful kids.
Joey: Great!
Phoebe: But then we ditch those two and that’s when we get married. We’ll have Chandler’s money and Rachel’s kids and getting custody will be easy because of Rachel’s drinking problem.
Joey: Oh-oh! What about Ross?
Phoebe: I don’t want to go into the whole thing, but umm, we have words and I kill him.

Friends, 6x02 TOW Ross Hugs Rachel

Ross: Look, I studied karate for a long time. And there’s a concept you should really be familiar with. It’s what the Japanese call… Unagui.
Rachel: Isn’t that a kind of sushi?
Ross: It’s a concept!
Phoebe: Yeah, it is! It’s freshwater eel!
Ross: Uh, maybe it means that too…
Rachel: Oh! I would kill for a salmon-skin roll right now.

Friends 6.17 TOW Unagui

fffriends:

1x07 TOW The Blackout

Hahahaha one of my favorite episodes. Gum would be perfection. Oh Chandler.

No, you’re not crazy. SHE’S EVERYWHERE!

Friends 10x17/1x18 The Last One

heartwarming:

JOEY; All right, huddle up, right over here.
PHOEBE; Wait for me! Wait for me! Wait for me! Oh cool, this is my first huddle. Okay, so what do you guys really think of Chandler?
MONICA; Okay, Phoebe, you know what you’re doing right?
PHOEBE; Yeah.
MONICA; Okay, Joey’s gonna catch it, and you and I are gonna block.
PHOEBE; What’s block?
MONICA; Phoebe, I thought you said you know what you’re doing.
PHOEBE; I thought you meant in life!

Friends, 3x09 The One with the Football

GTFO 2009. Like I said yesterday, I hope 2010 brings me some sunshine and optimism. Also angels.